nordic babe

thiccsbx

exoticsugar-xo:
“silver-couture:
“bliss-folly:
“exotichoe:
“ twxntyonepepes:
“ toobare:
“ proqressions:
“ silver-couture:
“ crotchkat-vantass:
“ juststrokemyglabella:
“ 2spookysamy:
“ highonvodka:
“ themixedbagofspooky:
“ spoopy-len-in-a-dress:
“...

Source: inritum

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sugar-girlfriend

uudenpaskanhaju

Upea galaxy brain huomaus herra presidentti, arvasit meidän salaisuudet miten estetään metsäpaloja maassa missä mikään ei ole kuiva

glixbitch

I feel like there might be a slight difference in climate between Finland and California aksjdksja

unleashthemidnight

liripip

I wish I was Finnish so I too could make fun of this 😂

keigan-of-sweden

Finns are generally very polite and quiet. You know you’ve fucked up when the entire country publicly makes fun of you.

Source: uudenpaskanhaju

dutchprincess1

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

i gave my sister $100 for her bday, but i gave it to her in $1 bills that i folded into origami. so that’s how she pays for delivery food & now the pizza girl thinks she’s a stripper

just-artist-thoughts

You’re really good at origami holy sh

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

i learned it specifically to make these for this exact situation

queer-musician

Aren’t you the same bitch that gave your sister $100 dollars in nickels?

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

same bitch

wetmetal

Yeah, neither of these things happened 👍🏼

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

listen here my good hoe, i can’t find photos of the 2000 nickels or the 20 stars, but i did not spend weeks planning meticulously inconvenient birthday gifts over a period of years just to get whaled on by internet gremlins. here is some equally compelling evidence for an anecdote i was saving for later:

it weighed 68.6 lbs

judedeluca

This is the 100 Star. Reblog to receive cash in unexpected ways.

Source: biggest-gaudiest-patronuses

germansugarbaby

What in Hell am I Going to Talk to Him About?- 23 Tips and Tricks to Help You Master the Art of Conversation

sheabuttersugarbaby

Become a New Money Girls Art Collector

I am socially awkward. There is a kinder way to say this, I’m sure, but I see no reason to sugar coat. I am an introvert. I am happiest surrounded by snacks, books, and my own thoughts. I became a sex worker for two reasons. The first- I wanted to control my time. The second- jobs that let you completely avoid human contact don’t pay very well.

If you think that sex work is only about sex, you don’t know anything about our industry. We are entertainers, therapists, mother figures, distractions. Our job is to take the client’s mind off his mundane life, the things about himself he doesn’t like, his problems. We are a smoke and mirror show. The show begins and ends with the words that come out of our mouths. Our words can creat a beautiful experience or ruin it.

My words ruined most experiences in the beginning. I was stilted, stiff, and awkward. There were long silences. I was always looking for an exit. I knew that to be successful I would have to figure this out. I turned to the same place I always look to when I have a problem to solve: books. In particular, Leil Lowndes’ How to Talk to Anyone. It boasts 92 tricks to help you build relationships with anyone. I wasn’t going to remember 92 tips and I wasn’t going to give myself an anxiety attack trying. Instead I picked the 20 or so tips that seemed to suit my needs best and worked on 5 or 6 each week. In a month I had introduced all 23 into my regular interactions. Things haven’t been the same since.

Make eye contact. People are insecure by nature. We always wonder if we’re boring a person, if they really want to speak to us, if what we’re saying makes sense. Eye contact eliminates this doubt. If you look a person in the eye, it signals that you not only hear what they’re saying but are interested in it. If you have to look away do it slowly. This reinforces your interest and enjoyment of what you’re hearing.
Look at them even if someone else is speaking. Want to make someone love you? Turn them into the center of your world. You don’t have to announce your undying love or slay dragons. You just have to continue to look at them despite what is going on around you. That person will suddenly feel like the most attractive and dynamic person in the room.
Don’t fidget. It ruins your credibility. We equate stillness with integrity. Those that can look us in the eye and simply relate a piece of information are always believed over those that try to tell us something while scratching their elbow or squirming in their seat. Even if you are believed, you probably won’t be seen as an authority figure the way the still person is.
Small talk is not about words; it’s about melody. A good conversation mirrors a dance. The people participating are in sync. If the person that you are speaking to is calm and relaxed, you should be too. Match their energy and the conversation will move much more fluidly.
There’s value in slips of the tongue. People tell you what they want to talk about without realizing that they are doing it. We can’t help it. We naturally want to talk about things that are pleasing to us and constantly introduce them into conversation. Focus on these moments and use them to your advantage. You don’t have to know what to talk about. You have to know how to listen to what is being said to you and know when to introduce those slips into conversation.
Keep the focus on them. People love to talk about themselves. Our favorite topic as humans is always ourselves. We want to feel like we matter. We want to feel like someone hears us and cares. Use this to your advantage. Always find a way to refocus the conversation on the person you are speaking to. You will quickly become their favorite person to speak to.
Know what’s happening in the world. Don’t want to talk about you? Don’t know what to talk about at all? Don’t worry. There’s a whole world out there teeming with events that are perfect for conversation. Not only does knowing what’s happening outside of your own bubble give you something to discuss, it makes you appear more intelligent.
Don’t be delicate. Call things by their names. The goal is to subconsciously position yourself as the equal of the person that you’re speaking to. Hopefully, the person you’re speaking to has money. A lot of it. People with money don’t mince words. They don’t have time. Instead they state what they want, what they’re thinking as directly and with as few words as possible. This doesn’t mean that they’re crass. But they don’t have time to cushion mundane things in a way that doesn’t offend the faint hearted. Mirror them. It isn’t the little girls room. It’s a restroom, a bathroom. Use your words. Use the right words.
Don’t make jokes at another person’s expense. People love to laugh. People love jokes. People do not love to be laughed at. Don’t be fooled if they laugh along with you. We want to spend time with people who make us feel better about who we are not those who point out our flaws in the hopes of getting a laugh. If you must make fun of someone, make fun of yourself. It shows that you don’t take yourself seriously and that you’re human and relatable.
Shut them up. Sometimes men insist on asking the same question over and over again despite knowing that the question is something that makes you uncomfortable. This is easily handled. Repeat your answer in the exact same tone of voice every time any variation of the question is asked. The key is to use the same intonation. Any fluctuations in tone indicate that he’s hit a sore spot and may be making progress towards an answer he likes. Use your voice as a brick wall. Eventually he’ll move on.
Sound like an expert on their job or hobby. This is useful if you know a little about the person ahead of time. It’s also incredibly simple. Learn 2 insightful questions about their career or hobby and ask them. Learn the most annoying question that outsiders ask and avoid it.
Read the things that they read. If you’re the lucky girl that continually attracts hedge fund managers, learn their field. You don’t have to know it as well as they do. But your value rises exponentially when you can show that you have more than a surface understanding of what’s happening in their field. Pick up a newspaper or a specialty magazine and read a few articles.
Mirror them. If you’re ever in a place where you aren’t sure of the etiquette, mirror the person you are with. Others may judge you but he won’t. If he judged you, he’d be judging himself and that is something we just don’t do. Mirror his movements in conversation too. If he talks with his hands, talk with yours. If he moves his entire body to emphasize a point, don’t sit stock still. We speak to others the way we prefer to be spoken to.
It’s not “you and me”. It’s “we”. Make him forget that you are two individuals. You are a unit facing the world, seeing the world, together. It starts simply. When you speak about the weather, you don’t want to say “It’s been sunny outside hasn’t it?”. Instead, try “we’ve been having great weather. How have you been enjoying it?”. Everything leads back to the two of you as a team. Throw in we, our, and us into your conversation as much as possible.
Make them earn your smile. Women who don’t smile easily are viewed as powerful. It also puts the man in the position of trying to find things to say that please you. We want him to be interested in earning your approval. We want to make him work. A small quirk of the lips can be used as often as you like. But save those pearly whites for the right moment.
If they show pride, you give praise. We are all children at heart. Nothing makes us feel better than a pat on the back and a “well done”. We want to know that our accomplishments are seen and appreciated no matter how small they are. We are always looking for someone who can lay our insecurities to rest. Be that person. In conversation, if a person says something and then pauses and looks at you significantly, they are waiting for the applause. Be there to give it to them. You do not have to think what they did was impressive. You have to be there ready to dispense a pat on the back. We continuously go back to those that make us feel good about our selves. Handing out compliments like candy is a great way to become that person.
Learn how to take a compliment. There is a way to accept compliments that conditions a person into wanting to give them. Turn their compliment to you into a way to compliment them. He said he liked your shoes? If you respond with “Thank you so much. I love how you always notice the little details about me. It’s so refreshing.” His chest will puff with pride. He will associate complimenting you with feeling positively about himself.
When you’re on the phone, learn to verbalize your actions. I hate talking on the phone. I can’t read a book and talk. I can’t listen to Rihanna and talk. But depending on your field, you’re going to have to talk on the phone. Remember that he can’t see you. Your eye contact, your body language, they are of no help here. You’ll have to turn those actions into words. You can’t nod but you can say, “that makes sense” “I understand”. “That’s so interesting” “Really?” and “Tell me more” replace eye contact.
Make an entrance. The first part of the conversation happens well before you open your mouth. Sometimes it happens before you’ve even laid eyes on them. When you enter a room, have your head up and your shoulders down. You belong there as much as anyone else. Be dramatic. Pause in the entrance and survey the room slowly. Allow your eyes to travel from one said of the room to the other. You may feel silly at first and wonder if anyone has even spotted you. I guarantee you, someone will.
Strike first. There’s a man that looks like he can make your financial dreams come true. Don’t shoot him a shy smile and scurry off to the corner. Walk up to him confidently and say, “I’m Nadia. You look like an amazing person to talk to. You don’t mind if I sit here do you?”. You’ve complimented him, introduced yourself, and wormed your way into his evening in less than 10 seconds. Congratulations.
Keep your body open. Not quite bold enough to walk up to a stranger? That’s okay, we’ll get there. You can instead invite him to come talk to you without saying a word. Use your body. Again, good posture is key here. Don’t slouch, or close your body off by clutching a purse or crossing your arms. Keep your body relaxed and open. Bonus points if you can find a way to rest or stand with your inner wrist and palms visible.
Remember their events. Even the trivial ones. Everything is an event to us. You only have to turn to Instagram to find proof of this. You can find posts of everything that occurs in a person’s day from their breakfast to their choice of nail polish. Even the most mundane things hold significance to the person they’re happening to. Remember these small things and bring them up in conversation. You will be amazed at how much more admiration you’ll receive just because you can remember and express an interest in the small things.
Don’t notice the little things. There are no bloopers. Notice the trivial events but don’t notice the trivial mistakes. He spilled a glass of water. Mop it up with a few napkins but keep talking to him as if it didn’t happen. People are more at ease when they know they don’t have to watch their every move around you.

The overarching theme of this book in my opinion is simple: great conversationalists understand that it isn’t about them. I was awkward and stilted in conversation because I focused on myself first and the person I was speaking with second. When I focused on them first, conversation and money flowed. I still prefer being alone but knowing that I can handle myself in any verbal interaction has boosted my confidence and made my interactions with others more bearable. I want that same confidence for you. You can do this. You deserve this. I believe in you.

My name is Nadia and I am a New Money Girl.

Nadia is important to me as an introvert. I don’t talk. I say just enough so that you don’t make me talk. But that’s not quite the same as a conversation is it? I encourage you to introduce a few of these tips into your life the way Nadia did: a few at a time. I think you’ll see that they make a huge difference. Can you believe we’ve already met over half of the girls? I hope you’re loving them as much as I am.

Bring Nadia home today. Become a New Money Girls Art Collector

germansugarbaby

“great conversationalists understand that it isn’t about them. I was awkward and stilted in conversation because I focused on myself first and the person I was speaking with second. When I focused on them first, conversation and money flowed. I still prefer being alone but knowing that I can handle myself in any verbal interaction has boosted my confidence”

This is gold for introverts! 🤗👏🏻

Source: sheabuttersugarbaby

sugarbabymindset

harlotho

my bae here just bought his $1.2 million dollar crib and we fucked allllll night at a 4.5 star hotel to celebrate. I’m posting this off c*ke and a whole fucking lot of champagne.

I feel glorious

sugarbabymindset

okay, queen

Source: harlotho

8211997

niqabisinparis

Motivation is overrated. No amount of motivation would’ve gotten me through hours of my accounting textbook. No “vision” is enough to keep me awake til the crack of dawn on an essay that I don’t even know if the professor will check. Discipline is what determines how far you go. On those days when your cute little list of #goals and vision of yourself 5 years from now aren’t enough, discipline will pull you out of bed and get you to work. I wish I knew this in high school because I thought I couldn’t work without motivation. I wasted so much time trying to find purpose before I realized that working now, albeit blindly, will ensure that I could chase any purpose I discover in the future. Sure, motivation is crucial, but it’s not consistent. It’s not reliable. You can only rely on yourself and your grit.

Source: niqabisinparis

sb-jowe

I wish POT’S would shower me in money the same way they shower me in compliments that have no monetary value :)))))

Source: brownsugarcinnamonbun

sb-jowe

refleurira

i wish i could just be one of those Ambiguously Wealthy Fashion Biches that live in new york lofts and drink $20 café au laits and have meetings with creative directors and take selfies in the mirrors of gucci showrooms

Source: refleurira

dangerouslyyoungphilosipher

Sugar Sweet Success

sugarsweetrhose sugarsweetrhose

Hi my loves, here are the things I live by to be a successful SB.

You have to make him fall in love with you. Period. That’s honestly what keeps them coming back. What I do every time I encounter a POT is figure out what kind of girls he likes\ the kind of girl he wants. If I can’t figure it out I straight up ask, “Whats your fantasy?” then I become it.
Always look good. Tell yourself you’re never at a 10, there’s always something to make yourself look better. Amp your makeup game, go to the gym more, get those extensions, whatever you need to do.
Have a style icon. Someone you mirror your outfits, hair, and makeup after. Mine is Kim K and an assortment of girls on Instagram.
Have dreams and aspirations. These all could be fake honestly. Tell him you want to open a boutique, own a lingerie line, go to medical school. Whatever. Bring it up sometimes, but not a lot. It’s just helps shape the image that you are the full package. Beautiful, smart, and driven. Tell him you’ve traveled, lie about the places you’ve been too. Guys like to fuck and stay around interesting girls. Remember.
Also, don’t just fuck him on your dates. And don’t always just get together just to fuck. Suggest other things. Look up cool places to eat and bars in your area. He has to see that other men crave you and in order for that to happen you guys have to go out.
Cancel sometimes when he really wants it, but follow up with a cute snap of you in lingerie. Don’t always be available. My personal thing is I never answer those, “I want to see you tonight” texts. Ever. I need 48 hours notice.
Watch porn. Up your sex game. Try something new with him.
Make sure he knows that he can confide in you. Shoulder rubs while you talk quietly to him, ask him how his day was. You have to be soft. Never really raise your voice. Always always sweet.
Remember, you’re a business woman. You are your product. Invest in it and the results will show.

babysugarsugar

Sugaring 101: Upping your bedroom game with some sensuality and simple escort tricks.

femininephilanthropist

*** Warning: Only try this with the sugardaddies you actually like and feel some attachment too. And definitely trust ***

Please heed the warning or you will crash and burn if you attempt the following.

PREPARE YOUR MEETING PLACE: If you’re regularly meeting at a hotel room, get daddy to get you a prepaid card so that you can go ahead and rent the room ahead of your visit. This will save him the trouble of doing it and allow you a chance to control your interaction. A lot of escorts do this for that very same reason: control. For him, the businessman or exec who’s dealing with all kinds of shit this takes some pressure off him. What you have to understand about a successful man is that he’s always under pressure. He’s getting beat to shit daily from work, life, and home and he’s probably middle-aged meaning half of daddy’s life is already gone. Daunting. You need to be the calming voice in his life. When he gets there, of course be in your best lingerie, smelling good, etc, with the sheets pulled back on the bed. Or, answer the door naked, in a pair of red bottoms, etc. Or, ask to keep one of his ties for a souvenir on a previous date and when your next visit at the room arrived, have it on and nothing else.

If you host your visits at your residence, then ask daddy what kind of snack he likes. Fruit? Have some strawberries or grapes waiting for him when he comes over. He likes wine, etc.,? Have a glass poured. You can enjoy glass too. Its ok. If you have a problem drinking with daddy, refer to my warning above. :)

RELAX HIM: Give daddy a massage. Not an hour, just 10 minutes to break him down. This is a good time to ask for shit. If he has dry skin, bring some oil in your purse. First rub his back, making sure you’re getting in between those shoulder blades, etc. Skip the legs, lower torso etc. Unnecessary. He’s tense from meetings and conference calls all day. Turn him over and rub him briefly on his chest before you work your way down to his love zone. Rub his dick and don’t forget the boys. When he’s nice hard, start fellatio (if you do fellatio). If he doesn’t want a massage or doesn’t have time that’s cool. You need to put it out there anyway.

Time taken: 7 - 10 minutes

LAY YOUR HEAD ON HIS CHEST: After sex, cuddle up next to him and lay your head on his chest. If he has little or no hair this will be easy. If he’s a hairy bastard you might find another place to lay your head but the goal is to cuddle him. Use the hair to your advantage and play with it as you lie there. Twist it in your fingers or some shit. Make him feel like he just pleased you in every way possible. He probably didn’t, but it’s all about the fantasy. This is easy to do if you like him. Refer to my warning above! Say something meaningful like, “That was good daddy.” If you have psychological hang-ups about calling him daddy then say “That was good baby..” or “Mmmm I needed that.” All too often chicks are just lying there side by side with him in her own world. You can remain in your own world just do it cuddling him. This is also a good habit to have when you get married. :)

Time taken: Not applicable

CLEAN HIM UP: Grab a warm damp warm towel, and remove the condom. Wipe up his penis and go put the condom in the toilet. If no condom was used, you can still clean him up if his penis is about stick to his leg. If he’s caught off your guard, or ask what you’re doing, tell him “I’m just taking care of you daddy…” I got this one from several Escorts I’ve seen over the years. Trust me. You want some brownie points? Try it a few times. You can even be cute about it and say, “Gosh, you had a lot in there.” Or my FAVORITE “….I see you’ve been saving up for me. You had a lot!” The latter is perfect for you babies seeing daddy once a week. When you’re done cleaning him up, lay back on him. This is also another good time to ask for shit.

Time taken: 30 - 45 seconds

TASTE IT: Now I might lose a few of you here but it’s my duty to put it out there anyway. While you cleaning him up, put a forefinger in your mouth and say, “Mmm you taste good.” He might pass the hell out. If you’re good at this he won’t know you don’t actually have some cum on your finger. Hopefully, some of you catch what I mean on the latter. :) Or, if you swallow anyway then nothing is wrong with a little protein on your finger and tasting it.

Time taken: 2 seconds

PUT HIS SHIRT ON: If you’re going to be in the hotel room awhile, try this one out. This will kill him. If he wears good smelling cologne capitalize on it. With the shirt on, pull the collar up to your nose and say, “Mmm I love your smell daddy…” You won’t be lying if he wears good cologne. Chances are you already noticed his cologne but you were too much of a bitch to say you smell good. This is the sexiest shit EVER though. Nothing cuter than your 110, 120, 150 lbs ass in his big ass shirt. One of my previous sugarbabies used to do this. Drove me crazy.

Oh and congratulations!!!! Now he’s going to be thinking about you the rest of the day. You’ve inadvertently left your perfume on his shirt. Now he’s gonna be smelling your pretty little ass the rest of the day. Just don’t leave any lipstick!

Take a selfie with the shirt on. Send it to him days later in between your visits.

Time taken: 10 seconds to put on his shirt. Time elapsed before he wants to take it back off and fuck again: 60 seconds. Likelihood of you getting that Celine purse: High.

HELP HIM GET DRESSED: This one is especially important for the busy executive, businessman or man that works in a professional setting and he’s on his lunch break, or on his way home to his vanilla life. No, don’t help him pull his trousers up. But you can help with the belt as you kiss him on the chest. I’m saying as he buttons his shirt, go help him. Help him button the ones on his sleeves as well. And most important help put his tie back on and straighten it and his collar afterwards. Then finish it with a kiss. If you don’t get a chance to do all that, then collect his shoes and socks and bring them to him. Don’t’ try and put those on - that’s just corny. You’ll love his reaction I promise.

Time taken: 30 – 45 seconds

CUDDLE HIM: Recently, I learned something about myself. I read somewhere that one of the reasons why I cheat is because I as a man want to be cuddled and held. I thought this was bullshit but it’s quite true. I know this is contrary to all the SD advice you’ve been getting but take it from a long standing member of the sugar community its true. I’ll explain this one better by giving a real life example. Now when I would first come over, Nebraska and I would sit on her bed and talk and she’d find some way to wrap her legs around and hug me like I was her long lost boyfriend. I was going through some things and it felt good for somebody in this world to seemingly take an interest in my plight. Then, she’d just sit there and stare at me like I was a big piece of steak. Staring at my mouth. When I’d talk too long she’d start taking off my clothes. While she was getting me undressed, she was always say one of these 3 things: “ I know you didn’t’ come here to do all that talking…” or “You just gonna talk?” or my favorite “Or we gonna fuck or not daddy?” One day, after sex I was sitting on the bed and she climbed on the bed, sat down behind me so that I was in between her legs. As I was talking so she kissed me gingerly on my back and also laid her head on my back as we talked. This shit made me feel like a king. When Nebraska and I ended our arrangement she said, “Well I was actually genuinely interested in you…” This is why I mentioned only try these techniques when you have some type of genuine attraction to daddy. Its easier to do and you won’t be faking which will speak volumes.

Time taken: none. You were going to be doing all this talking anyway, just on one side of the bed or side by side as you sat on the bed. The difference here is you’re cuddling him while you do it.

Now, I’m about to drop half of you right here.

LET HIM CUM TWICE: You’re laying there in his arms, listening to his bullshit. Reach down and play with his love while he’s talking. After a moment ask, “You got another round in you daddy?” Regardless of his answer, go down and start blowing him again. It should be cleaned if you followed my advice earlier – clean him up. Anyway, if he said no, he’ll appreciate your dedication and let you try and revive him before he stops you. If he says yes, then its self explanatory. Relax though. Your middle-aged daddy most likely won’t have a second round in him anyway. This METHOD is extremely effective with the sugarbabies that only see their daddy once a week. But, for other arrangements its works quite well too.

A lot of chicks are jumping up, cleaning up and rushing out the door, saying how you have so much to do today. Nothing kills a relationship like feeling like you’re being used (even though you actually are!). But remember, you want him around awhile. This is definitely a powerful tool to make that happen. Sends a clear signal that you’re all about pleasing him. (I hope the latter doesn’t get me in trouble). Trust me. An extra several minutes is cheap time to spend if you knew you’d be getting another 4 - 6 months out of daddy.

Time taken: 5 – 7 minutes

FINISHING TOUCHES: Put the finishing touches on it. When you’ve helped him finish getting dressed, and you know he’s on his way back to work or back to business, when he heads out the door say something encouraging like, “Go get’em baby.“ Or if he told you about some crap going on at work, take the opp to regurgitate it. “Fuck Bob. He’s an asshole. You should have got the promotion.” blah blah. You get the point. The latter can be applied even as you both do a last kiss before you head out the door. Again, it’s all about the finishing touches.

Time taken: 2 seconds

I know some of you are saying, “I ain’t doing all that shit.” But remember you are selling a fantasy. You’re giving the most precious part of your body away. Only to have your average sugardaddy relationship end in 2 to 3 months? All because he’s had his fill of your kitty. I assure you incorporating these techniques into your visits with daddy will go a long way and add months onto your relationship. This will help keep him coming back for more and more. Another way to put it, why not hook daddy for several months or even a few years and milk him dry (no pun intended) with just a few extra things?

I put the time on the end of these sections to show how long these little techniques actually take. Like I always say just a little extra goes a LONG way. These simple yet EXTREMELY effective techniques WILL prolong your sugar relationship. So why not incorporate them into your experience? I GUARANTEE daddy will respond to this stuff. I know because I’ve had it all done to me before and it blew me away then and it blows me away now as I type!

Damn I’m horny now. And my visit with sugarbaby isn’t for a few days.

Time to close the office door and get in a little pornhub and redtube.

Source: femininephilanthropist

missdarlingsb

spearmint-milkshake

i just saw a fb post where a man was arguing with a woman about the best way to make macarons and he kept insisting that she was wrong, and then eventually he was like “I’ve never personally made macarons, but if you think about it what I’m saying makes sense, i’m simply stating the obvious. i’m sure there are plenty of youtube tutorials that would show you the same thing.” and the woman replied by linking him to her instagram business page and she makes fuckin macaron towers for parties for a living and i’ve been laughing about it for a solid 5 minutes.

cocksmasher69 cocksmasher69

Men automatically assume they’re more of an expert on something than any woman on account of their dicks. I’ve never met such an ignorant and narcissistic creature as a male

cheekless0nion

I’ll never forget a time when a fb friend of mine posted that she’s on her way to hospital to give birth. Women commented with “good luck” and other encouraging messages. A man’s comment was advice on how to give birth.

celean0

You have got to be kidding me

wreathedinscales

So I was talking about Jekyll & Hyde (the book) at a writer’s museum while we were looking at an Robert Louis Stevenson exhibit. I was giving my take on Jekyll, and my brother tried to counter it. I countered back easily, and then he said “well I’ve never read the book”

My dude………..stop

coffeebuddha

my ex, whose baking experience was pretty much limited to frying premade biscuit dough in boy scouts to make ‘donuts’, would constantly try to correct me or give me advice on baking

i’m a fucking pastry chef

gotlostintheuniverse

met a dude at a party who was talking about physics and asked if i’d ever listened to any online physics lectures bc he listened to all of this one series and they were so helpful and maybe i could learn some physics too

i have a degree in physics

and am a published coauthor in astrophysics

virginieawoolf

the best part is that the woman who invented the term ‘mansplaining’ (her name is Rebecca Solnit and i highly recommend her collection of essays) came up with it when she was at a party one night and a man tried to explain a book to her, and wouldn’t let her speak long enough for her to tell him that

she wrote the bloody book he was mansplaining to her

magpieanabelle

You know I have plenty examples of this but that last one takes the cake so imma just let it be.

Source: spearmint-milkshake

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

More you might like

What in Hell am I Going to Talk to Him About?- 23 Tips and Tricks to Help You Master the Art of Conversation

I wish POT’S would shower me in money the same way they shower me in compliments that have no monetary value :)))))

Sugar Sweet Success

Sugaring 101: Upping your bedroom game with some sensuality and simple escort tricks.

Accents 101